For years, I've done so many bad things that I wish I would just turn back time and just..... Change it all, to people who I had lived with on my fostering life, the foster parent opened the door, see my social worker, then, when they look down, they babble on how pretty I was, "lovely eyrs", "beautiful hair" .... "Soft skin", but was it the truth when they say these things to 'bribe ' me Into their life? Could this be the same with any relationships I end up going into? Yes, yes it is, and every time I hear the words come out of someone's mouth, it's always "she's cute/adorable/georgious" , it makes me want to be sick... Literally.... I'm not making it up, so, I always wonder to myself, I'm an the "angel" who will be used every time for the fun? Will I become a demon after I had finished being their/your angel? I do not know, because, my head is full stuff that it can't decide but brings me into an endless nightmare that I wish it would just.... Go awayw.... But it wont, because I will always hear people calling me "cute", "pretty", "georgious" and others related.

Do I really mean what I say to people? No, I do not, yet sometimes I do mean it, just like blog, I mean every single word that is and any future blogs, sure, there will be times where I regret what I say, but it's true, and when I say I'm no angel, it me and that I'm no angel, please take my word as well when I say this, "I do not have a heart to love but to break ones heart.."

 I hope you guys can get the message and understand....

-Alastor