THEY SAID I WAS NUTS! THEY HAD NO IDEA WHAT A PERSONAL ISSUE THIS QUESTION WAS, AND I WAS DETERMINED TO FIND THE ANSWER AND MOVE ON.

I wrote essentially the following when I was 16:

"Who Am I?"

They ask me

to write about this

on my college application.

That is actually the question of the universe:

What is self?

Who am I?

I seemingly cannot prove that I exist or do not exist.

Descartes wrote, "I think, therefore I exist."

Seemingly impressive,

but it is circular and unscientific reasoning.

It moreoever would not apply after I died:

what proof that I had ever actually "existed"?

I actually cannot separate myself

from the universe.

The boundary of skin is an illusion.

Thus the boundary of death would be an illusion.

The boundary of birth would be an illusion.

I swallow the universe with all my senses.

The universe and I

breathe each other in and out.

I am a universe.

But to be solipsist is insane, suicidal

and I seemingly would no longer exist..

The only way for me to remain sane

is to accept the following:

"We" all each are different

and equally

a universe,

the same as the universe!

[I'll get to "who is 'we'?"]

For my sanity again, I state that

our feelings and everything

are obviously

differently the same,

the same differently.

The universe thus is sentient,

infinitely-dimensionally.

It is not just the human species.

There is no way to draw a boundary line.

I defy you you to honestly do so.

All sentient life thus should in like manner be a/the universe.

But again there is no way to draw a line.

It would equally apply to insentient life.

But again,

because no one could mathematically draw the line,

## it may apply equally to "nonlife."

. it would apply to atoms and to subatomic particles.

They too contain the universe.

They therefore are infinitely intercontained.

[Turn the universe inside out at every point

and its essence would remain unchanged.

The self and environment reflect each other.]

They too are sentient, conscious in their way.

There must be a physics to explain this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aristotle said, "The whole is greater than its parts."

I state, "The whole is contained in each of its parts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

All particles are equally intercontained,

as are all anythings we might consider "entities", or "systems".

In a way that is blurred so far

[the nature of the inherent entropic fuzziness must be exactly clarified],

"we" are all infinitely intercontained

and correspondingly, interconnected.

An algorithm of infinite recursion [of such recursions].

The new [system/matrix] calculii are yet to be developed!!

Note that thus energy/matter and information/consciousness

are inseparable.

They are different manifestations of the same thing.

Do they have a symmetry,

a mathematics whereby

the "essence" of the universe would remain invariant

under the transformation[s] of their exchange?

[Perhaps there would be a dance of such transformations

[of course transcending space-time].

Remember the invariances under projective geometry

when points and lines are interchanged.

Remember the mathematics of quaternions

with 3 different square roots of -1

whose paired product merely changes sign

when their order changes.

Is the fact that quaternions are so significant in physics

[one way of]

hinting at a far higher physics/mathematics to embody the symmetry

inferred at the beginning of this paragraph?

In Riemannian geometry,

"what goes around comes around."

Do not look too deep into your environment

or you will see yourself reflected.

[Reflected in countless ways in the most complex-seeming mirror.]

In fact, if time is an imaginary axis in space-time,

then by the Pythagorean theorem

the distance in space-time

of two points connected by a ray of light

will be zero.

Can this be made to correspond to quantum entanglement?

They are the same point.

But seemingly everything in the universe

could be thusly so interconnected

and thus superposed.

Endlessly reflecting each other,

the zero-dimensional point

actually infinite-dimensional in information.

All fields of mathematics

will be involved in this.

Each field consists of axioms

leading in endless "progressive" networks of theorems

which in ultimately recursive infinitude

could turn into a field of "living tissue".

Infinite fiers or internetworks

of fields of mathematics?

They will become one.

What will be that new geometry, the ultimate new mathematics?????

First we must figure out how

not to destroy ourselves on this planet

before we can figure that out.

Perhaps indeed

these two questions

are utterly interconected!!!!?

I have an infinite way further to go.

First I have to go to college.

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